All planets have gone direct. After taking us into the New Year retrograde, Mercury is stationed direct in my house of finance and communication. I took the first part of an Intuitive Development series, learning to connect and communicate with my guides.
Two things have strongly stuck to my awareness:
- get prepared to move out. March sounds good.
- The Wild Heartspace : a journey of awakening (side note: this was supposed to be a travel blog. The more I read travel blogs, the more I don’t want to write one. There are enough out there. This is something different. Something special. I don’t know where it is supposed to go. But it’s always been part of my dharma and I have relinquished the fruit with commitment to action.)
The course instructor advised we sit in the same spot at the exact same time every day for 21 days for at least 5 minutes. It just so happens to co-incide with an intention to deepen my meditation practice. She said her best time to connect with spirit was between 10pm and 4am, when everyone else was going to sleep and there was less chaos and clutter to make it through. For me, that makes sense as well. I always feel like I can go places in the night.
I am ready to hear you. To tune to the same frequency so we can take out the middle folks I so often rely on to validate your message. I am open to listening and abiding your recommendation. It will be a journey, and I am dedicated to the process.
-It’s okay to be early.
Today was a wonderful day of just going along and it was all perfect and I connected with some homegirls and it was just fucking real.
-The important stuff stays.
-I think I am beginning to understand fully being what I am seeking outside. Show up for yourself.
-Big revelation of how much I can live in my head. Like all those times I interpreted something to be real and lived in context of that assumption of that reality (while maintaining my scorpio mystique) without actually expressing any of the world I have made up. Expression doesn’t have to be verbal. Be soft. Be vulnerable. Feel it. Like the electric current pulsing through your veins.
I feel this greater sense of self and meaning and worth knowing I am connected to something larger. As claircognizant, I’ve always known. But putting it to practice is making it real.
My angels were in full force protection today (not unusual as of lately.) Gratitude to all of you.
What do I need to do? Work on R/L brain balance. I can literally feel the inflation of the right brain.
I harp this like, everyday. But how fortunate am I to work with people I love so much?!
If we all would have met 5 years ago, probably none of us would have been friends.
Even if we were casually friends now, we wouldn’t know the intimate details one only understand about working in a kitchen together.
I sat outside and stared at the moon and the backside of my apartment complex that is so rustic chic, and wondered, “Why can’t I just be happy with this?” (meaning long-term). Then I realized that the only thing that matters is that I am happy with it right now.
*Full moon in Cancer. *
And on day 5? I glimpsed into the understanding of the Law of Attraction.
I am beginning to understand the whole “be what you are searching for.” At an intellectual level (and as claircognizant) I’ve understood that it is real, but just now feel as thought I am living it by experience. Like attracts like, so when we are missing something from being out complete selves, the void remains. If we find the piece we’re looking for in ourselves, it also naturally comes to us from the outside world. Enter: Law of Attraction.
“My energy has shifted. Things are moving toward me that I once sought to feel whole or validated. I am already whole.”
I went somewhere in my meditation. For the first time, I actually felt my energy field. I actually went in. There was this pulse and vibration of self. And I understood my role here as a light worker. Vibe high. Touch many. Or a few. Whatever. Spread light.
It’s Friday the 13th and I’ve been in this shirt for the past two days.
An ice storm shut the city down and I took this as an excuse to not leave my apartment.
In a perfect world I would have done a lot more yoga; in reality I slept in and researched Thailand and made a smoothie and drank lots of coffee and read The Power of Now and took a nap and ate various carbs and binge watched New Girl and did Meghan Currie’s “Hips Like Taffy” Cody video and sat in meditation for possibly longer than I ever have. Or maybe I just really experienced it like never before. Then I found some chocolate in my purse (what a pleasant surprise after thinking I had no chocolate alllllll day) and de-iced the windshield to make tomorrow morning easier and collected the crystals I had left out to charge in the full moon and ya know what? It’s been pretty fucking perfect.
I am so fortunate. To be able to ask the questions. To have an inkling of an idea as to my purpose and meaning in this life. To have guides that have stuck with me long enough for me to want to hear them.
Maybe I can have it all.
Sometimes, I just want to make out with all of my friends.
Sometimes we need the next step. Other times, we just need the big picture to know it exists. It’s there for the steps to fall into place, however they may.
I saw the big picture. The life to work toward. And I can take pretty much any step I want because they are all leading to the same light.
On another note, I’ve been fully embracing hygge lately. And it’s a game changer.